The Rules of Us

THE RULES OF US is a YA contemporary about finding yourself and coming-of-age. Jillian and Henry have been dating for years, and they are absolutely best friends - they do everything together. On the night of junior prom, just as they are planning something big, Henry confesses that he thinks he is gay, and Jillian decides that she might be too. They decide to break up but stay best friends with some new ground rules, especially since they have been working together to get a prestigious scholarship to fulfill their college dreams.

As Jillian begins to allow herself to fully crush on Carla, Henry begins to move on with his own crush. However, remaining just friends may be harder than they thought, especially when their lives have been so enmeshed for so long. Their journey is one of defining themselves anew and beginning to realize the limits of their codependency.

This was a tougher read emotionally than I expected, as their journey is quite a difficult one. The story is told from Jillian's perspective. Her life has revolved around Henry for so long. They don't have any interests or activities or even classes that are not shared, so beginning to think of them as separate beings seems impossible. In the wake of their break up, she has been somewhat set adrift, though things are slow to change. Relationships are never easy, particularly for high schoolers who are still figuring out what they want. As she begins to get into things with Carla, this other relationship has some challenges as well, but the experience allows Jillian to begin to define what it is that she does want and who she might want that with.

In many ways, Henry and Jillian's relationship was unhealthy and codependent. This can make it really tough to see into and understand fully, but it does also lead to a lot of epiphanies as they begin to see the world outside of it and understand themselves better beyond their coupledom. Their break up was a bit messy in that it was hard for them to fully separate when they were still so much a part of each other's lives. I found a few scenes along the way to be particularly challenging to read, but it seemed in line with messy high school immaturity and blurred lines.

While the book revolved around relationships, the relationships were not really the point. It was more about figuring yourself out and determining where you wanted to go in life, themes that will resonate with teens. That being said, I would not pick this up if you are looking for romance - it's really more of an emotional coming-of-age story.

Overall, THE RULES OF US is a YA contemporary about finding yourself and choosing your own paths. Please note that I received a review copy. All opinions are my own.