Review Detail

For as long as the Strand family has existed, the women have received a magical gift on their fifteenth birthdays. When Nell gets the 'gift', at first it's subtle with ladybugs appearing while she's at piano practice. She feels joy. Then the other insects appear. Some are darker than others. Each represents an emotion of Nell. Beetles come whenever she feels shame. Wasps appear no matter how hard she tries to ignore her growing rage. Her other sister, Mora, possesses the gift of hearing music in her blood, a power that brings far more dangerous outcomes. While Nell’s family tries to manage, Nell's anger seethes beneath the surface.

What worked: Beautifully written lyrical tale infused with magic. There is a powerful rawness to this story. What at first appears to be a gift of magic instead has a darkness that other Strand family members either ignore or struggle against. Nell's mother's age changes with her emotions. The more she handles the difficulties in her family, the older she becomes. Pain and overbearing guilt have her regress back to a teenager. Nell's older sister's ability to hear music in her blood leads her to cut her body to release the music. An aunt's means of dealing is moving away from family, and she limits her contact by phone. Her father gets busy with his work.

Nell’s emotions are mirrored by the swarm of insects that encircle her, only to perish shortly after. Within, she is consumed by a deep anger over her mother’s apathy towards her and the sorrow of watching her older sister drift away. She even tries to be intimate with the new boy at her school to ignore her true feelings. In her phone contacts, she lists him as Antidote. Not by his name.

Multi-generational trauma is filled with secrets that no one wants to discuss. I was captivated by this intense novel and Nell's journey to understand her mystical ability, which seems more like a burden than a blessing.

Mora's stay at an institution is difficult for the whole family. I love how the author can show the raw emotions through poetry.

One stanza I loved:

Every girl.
Needs her anger

Unique twist on mental illness and the girl who struggles to give voice to her magical gift.